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Royal Variety...

Discussion in 'The Hummy Arms' started by af123, Dec 12, 2011.

  1. af123

    af123 Administrator Staff Member

    I don't know, only four people who use RS have set the Royal Variety to record.. what's the world coming to? Kids of today... *mumble*...

    (66 recorded the X-Factor final - I didn't even know it was on, getting old!)
     
  2. Brian

    Brian Administrator Staff Member

    I must admit that I am guilty of setting both, and not ashamed to admit it.:D
     
  3. Black Hole

    Black Hole Felinos Guru

    Dunno what it will make of my schedule!
     
  4. gomezz

    gomezz Well-Known Member

    What! No reality shows? :)
     
  5. oijonesey

    oijonesey Hummy.tv SEO Guru

    I must admit I saw a trailer the other day and it actually looked like it might be a variety show - not just a replacement for top of the pops with a bit of Xfactor/Britains got Talent winner thrown in! Where are the variety acts - I want magicians (saw Penn & Teller on the trailer so a tick for that) and people with random weird talents - juggling people with feet, people juggling chainsaws and ladders, people juggling other people, fire breathing, quick change acts (check out you tube for the good 'uns - they are good!), all the odd acts Paul Daniels used to have on (anyone remember the German couple? Someone and Helga I think they were called), all the ones that H&S (& RSPCA probably:)) wouldn't allow these days, people who could whistle and yodel at an olympic level, someone who worked out they could drink milk and make it come out of their eyes! Knife throwers!! (although there's enough of those wannabes on the high street every Saturday night it seems :(), someone who could snort spaghetti, hold onto one end and cough the other end out (a personal favourite of mine!), people who trained animals to squeek to a tune, trampoline/springboard acts, the oriental ones that defied all laws of safety and physical boundaries...

    I could go on (and you can all start to hum 'Jerusalem' or 'Land of Hope and Glory to yourselves now if you like)...where are the nations favourites? Where are all the people who used to be on "The Good Old Days" (now I am giving my age away - hey I was young at the time!!), what about the people between the dancers and the comedians on "Summertime Special" on Saturday nights? What about the acts that they used to make the contestants on The Generation Game try to copy? This is what we've given away by following the Americans, joining Europe, flocking en masse to supermarkets and destroying the local shopkeepers, and subscribing to Sky bloody TV!!!!!! (well maybe WE here haven't subscribed to Sky but anyway you get my drift...)

    OK sorry for the rant (but boy do I feel better for it)...it's time again for my medication...normal service will now be resumed.....
     
  6. gomezz

    gomezz Well-Known Member

    You can't beat a good plate spinning act. Wait! That is what the BBC is giving us now with its budget cuts. :frantic:
     
  7. Black Hole

    Black Hole Felinos Guru

    Somebody & Helga - I know who you mean. Used to stand in front of a loaded crossbow and escape chains or something. Never mind Paul Daniels, give me Debbie McGee!!
     
  8. oijonesey

    oijonesey Hummy.tv SEO Guru

    A quick google reminds me - Hans Moretti. Unfortunately it turns out Helga is no longer with us. As some of the google results suggested you just can't beat a big bald headed German guy with a bushy moustache being shot at for our entertainment on a Saturday night - d'you think we could get Tessa and Bruce to take up the act in tribute? Strictly Come Crossbows - how could it not be a hit?
     
  9. Trev

    Trev The Dumb One

    But we could omit Brucie and the act would last longer
     
  10. Black Hole

    Black Hole Felinos Guru

    Yes, you're right - Hans Moretti. Strictly Come Crossbows has already been done: it was called The Golden Shot.
     
  11. oijonesey

    oijonesey Hummy.tv SEO Guru

    But The Golden Shot only fired crossbow bolts at something thin and wooden - so actually you're not so far from my original suggestion as I thought!!! Up a bit, left a bit, down a bit - nice to shoot you, to shoot you - NICE!!!!!
     
  12. Black Hole

    Black Hole Felinos Guru

    Aren't you bitchy about Brucie :)
     
  13. oijonesey

    oijonesey Hummy.tv SEO Guru

    I love Brucie!! (see my previous rant!) and to add to that - "Here they are they're so appealing, come on dollies, do your dealing"!!!! You see? You just don't get quality like that these days. Especially not from Vernons missus (whom I was referring to in post #11)
     
  14. Trev

    Trev The Dumb One

    And I thought you were on about Ann Aston ;-)
     
  15. Wallace

    Wallace Slightly Pickled

    Probably Bernie the Bolt....